baseball - aubrey huff (balt oriole) is my hero

[radbag]

http://wnst.net/Home/tabid/36/EntryID/3728/Default.aspx





On Thursday, Bubba had Aubrey Huff in studio talking some baseball – this apparently is where the “horseshit” quotes came in. We only have the audio clips of that, not the video clips. However, the cameras apparently started rolling for Huff’s continuing conversation with internet porn star Melissa Midwest, an all-natural beauty who was NOT unattractive.

She entered the studio and below is a direct transcript of the footage that we’ve obtained via the internet.


Huff: “Let’s talk to our lady friend…”

Bubba: “Now Aubrey, do you jack off a lot on the road, like when you’re not with your wife.”

Huff: “It’s all I do. It’s all I do. You guys have no idea how much downtime there is in baseball. You wake up from a hangover about 1 o’clock.”

Producer shouts: “In the afternoon?”

Huff: “Oh, yeah! Lemme tell you this. When you are hung over, how horny are you? I’m horny, when I’m hungover, I’m horny. So I’m just gonna beat off. And that’s all I do.”

Bubba: “And do you have your own room or do you have a roommate.”

Huff: “No, I’ve got my own room. C’mon, I’m not gonna beat off in front of my own roommate. C’mon Bubba!”

Bubba: “What time is the team bus to get to the field, like 5?”

Huff: “Four o’clock.”

Bubba: “So for three hours you’re just jerking the fuck outta yourself.

Huff: You know what they have now in the hotels is the (paas??) for $34.99, you get the whole section.”

Bubba: “Who does that get billed to, you or the Orioles?

Huff: “No, that’s my own gig. When you check out and she (the hotel clerk) says, $34.99 and she looks at you as you’re checking out: ‘Ahh, you beat the shit outta it, didn’t ya?’ ‘Yeah, pretty much! Yeah, I jacked the fucking shit outta it!’ ”

Bubba: “So they did the room and you do the incidentals.”

Huff: “Yeah, incidentals are all us, which include porn. And jacking off.”

Bubba: “… We’ve done a lot of major league baseball players’ interviews and I’ve never heard one this candid. ‘I jacked the shit outta myself for three hours! What else is there to do?’ Not that ‘I’m studying the pitcher I’m going to go against.’

Producer: “So now I know the other ones are bullshitting us and Aubrey is telling the truth.”

Huff: “Exactly!”

Producer: “Do you guys do any studying or is there any of that going on? Or is the catcher the only one that’s really gotta study anything?

Huff: “The guys that are studying -- it’s bullshit. See ball, hit ball. You know what I mean? You’ve done it your whole life. You see the ball, you hit it. All this studying? Honestly, you’re gonna look at a piece of, a TV? And say this guy, this guy is going to throw me this way? No, he might throw you a different way! Who cares? Just see it and hit it!

[urapnes]

great interview! candidness is key.

[a1bion]

Guess we know now why the Orioles suck so bad. They don't have any energy for the game after jacking it all day.

[UFGirlluvr]

Aubrey Huff is a douche. I went over to St Pete for a Devil Rays-Reds game a few years back when he played for the D-Rays. During batting practice he was in the outfield shagging fly balls and there was a ton of kids out there asking for the baseballs. Most of the players seemed to be chucking them up there for them and good ol' Aubrey held out for the blonde that looked like she just got out of her day shift at Mons.