UK Student Accomplishes Greatest Non-Basketball Achievement By Tossing Football Whole

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The Unsportsmanlike Gentleman
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UK Student Accomplishes Greatest Non-Basketball Achievement By Tossing Football Whole

Post by The Unsportsmanlike Gentleman »

Sophomore Braden Meyers had no idea he was about to become a campus legend this afternoon when he picked up a football and tossed it a whole ten feet from where he stood. It was on his way to his macroeconomics class that Meyers noticed an unfamiliar oblong object blocking his path. Not sure what to do, he bent over, picked it up, and tossed it underhand out of his way, then continued on. A handful of students saw the seemingly innocuous act, but one student, Adam Harvey, knew something historic had just occurred. Harvey sprinted to the office of athletic director Mitch Barnhart to retrieve him.

"He came into my office out of breath and very frantic and told me I needed to come quick, that something HUGE had just happened," said Barnhart. "I followed him and he showed me this brown thing sitting in the grass and he explained to me what had happened. I went back to my office and did some research online and found that the object in question is a football used in sport. I looked through our record books and found nothing related to this sport they call 'football'. Just pages upon pages of basketball records. That's when I knew today was a historic day for this university."


No one knows how the football got there on Kentucky's campus. Barnhart said the ball looked to be brand new and never used before Meyers tossed it aside. Some believe the ball was left there by a Western Kentucky fan whose program is known for fielding a competitive football team.


Barnhart pulled Meyers from class and explained that he would now be the only non-basketball entry in the University of Kentucky record books. In addition, the ball and the clothes that Meyers was wearing at the time of the record--a Wildcats basketball t-shirt, cargo shorts and flip-flops--will be on display in a trophy case next to the recent men's basketball NCAA Tournament Champions trophy.


The news was surprising to Meyers and he expressed great humility in his new distinction. "I don't know what to say. It's an honor. I'm not really a sports fan to be honest. I don't even really follow the basketball team. This t-shirt I borrowed from my roommate, but it's cool, I guess."
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Courtesy of The Unsportsmanlike Gentleman
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