Biggest guru jackass contest.

Toothy · Post by **Toothy** » Wed Dec 08, 2010 6:50 pm

Rules: post stupid predictions, "inside info," "locks," "you can book its," etc., relating to the hiring of the next Gator football coach. ID the source/poster and the date.

Entries will be judged on a formula where GJ = SOP x PCOP (GJ=guru jackassery, SOP=stupidity of prediction, PCOP=pompous conviction of prediction). In other words: There is a chance they'll call Lou Holtz gets a high SOP score, but a low PCOP. Brian Kelly is absolutely, absolutely coming to Gainesville--I have this on inside information from Steve Babik: not that stupid. But really pompous.

TheTodd · Post by **TheTodd** » Thu Dec 09, 2010 9:58 pm

you're mom told me that Tommy Bowden will be the next coach at UF

G8rMom7 · Post by **G8rMom7** » Thu Dec 09, 2010 11:25 pm

As I've mentioned Bill is on Scout and says that Foley and Urban are in Tampa talking to Gruden today. But duh...he's calling the game, so they are likely helping him with his background as it's said the MNF crew is calling the Outback Bowl game...not sure if that is true. But I doubt seriously Gruden would seriously consider the job. Who would? He's got a great gig, and personally, I think he's pretty good at the whole announcer thing.

Toothy · Post by **Toothy** » Thu Dec 09, 2010 11:28 pm

What's more: when did Jon Gruden become so hot-shit as a coach? I don't quite see it.

G8rMom7 · Post by **G8rMom7** » Thu Dec 09, 2010 11:36 pm

^^^Concur. He won the super bowl with Dungy's team. But then you could say that when he WON the Super Bowl it was against HIS old team. Someone posted on FB (either Katie or News' page) that Gruden's offense is too complex and he wouldn't have the time to teach it to college kids because they have limits to how much they can practice, etc. I don't know about that.

But Bill also said the skuttle butt is that the coach will be chosen by next weekend. Again, just repeating what he's said he read.

Toothy · Post by **Toothy** » Thu Dec 09, 2010 11:55 pm

Dolin Cowherd said a few minutes ago:

I broke Kiffin to USC story

I heard from a rock-solid source that UF to call someone this morning abut job

The guy is a "big boy football coach"

Key word is "STAB"

Read more: http://www.gatorcountry.com/swampgas/showthread.php?t=178251#ixzz17gJe4Pqz

I hate that bastard. He is a clinic in how to make nothing last a long, long time.

G8rMom7 · Post by **G8rMom7** » Fri Dec 10, 2010 12:07 am

I was just coming on to post this exact thing. Bill said that Bob Redman is also saying there are four BIG names that no one is even talking about. Bill and i started speculating about crazy pie-in-the-sky type guys...Tony Dungy, Nick Saban (ha ha AA). Then Bill mentioned Pete Carroll...that would be funny. This happens every time this happens...all these big names come up and then we end up with a guy like Zook or Addazio.

I think it's more realistic to think about a Patterson or Pederson...what do I know I guess.

G8rMom7 · Post by **G8rMom7** » Fri Dec 10, 2010 12:07 am

And what the hell does STAB mean?

annarborgator · Post by **annarborgator** » Fri Dec 10, 2010 1:15 am

Bring back Zook. He's the best transition coach in the world.

G8rMom7 · Post by **G8rMom7** » Fri Dec 10, 2010 8:23 am

After I turned off my computer, I went over and sat with Bill to read what it said on Scout in the STAB thread. One of the "big" names thrown out just cracked me up...Don Shula! Ha ha ha ha. Then while lying in bed, I thought of another one...John Madden!

Now THOSE are BIG names! LOL

DocZaius · Post by **DocZaius** » Fri Dec 10, 2010 9:18 am

Shit,
Terry
A.
Bowden!

(interestingly, I can't find a middle name for either Tommy or Terry, so this may actually work)

Toothy · Post by **Toothy** » Fri Dec 10, 2010 9:35 am

I've heard two readings of the STAB Cowherd BS. One is "Second time at bat." The other is ... oh, I forget. I hate that dude. Oh, it was something about "A Bronco." This points at Peterson, McDaniel, Tebow, I suppose John Elway.

Dickless Colin Cowherd is playing a stupid game designed to make himself look prescient. One of the reasons I love Tony Kornheiser is that Kornheiser is merciless on Jim Rome. He's relatively gentle on Cowherd, but he punked CC right off the air here on the main DC sports station, 980 AM.

radbag · Post by **radbag** » Fri Dec 10, 2010 2:31 pm

tebow's coming back as a coach??

Toothy · Post by **Toothy** » Fri Dec 10, 2010 2:39 pm

Isn't even predicting the next coach, but for the record:

If I ever see David Lamm in person ... he's getting more than a "piece of my mind" ... and somehow, I have a feeling I'm not the only one who feels this way right now ....

Moments ago, "Lammie" (all 700+ pounds of him) was a guest on the "Open Mike" radio show on 740 am with Bianchi, and went on a 10-minute rant about Coach Meyer being on a "pity pot" ... being a crybaby who has no excuse for not spending time with his family ... acts like his job is more important than people in the military ... etc, etc, etc.

We can debate over and over as to whether some of the points he raised are valid -- but where Lamb-Chop went over the line is where he attacked Meyer personally (and very hard) ... saying he was a bad man, a bad father, bad character ...

Talk about "Pot calling the Kettle Black" ... for those of you who don't know Lamm's history, this is a guy who was fired when he was a newspaper columnist for selling his Super Bowl credentials, and rather than covering the game from "inside the stadium" as he was paid to do, went to a sports bar where he watched the game on TV and then wrote his column.

And with regard to his relationship with the Gators ... he wants his ass kissed, plain and simple (and when it's "not", he thinks nothing of using his "media pulpit" - limited as it may be, since he continually gets fired at each of his radio gigs - to rip into whoever he thinks is responsible). Many years ago, Galen Hall used to put Lamm in his "Sonny's barbeque" commercials where the two of 'em would yuk it up, chomp down on ribs (and most importantly, allow Lamm to expand on his ever-growing Jabba-the-Hut-Like girth).

Lamm is a pathetic waste of a human being ... and if you can't tell, I hate the guy

Read more: http://www.gatorcountry.com/swampgas/showthread.php?t=178488#ixzz17juJeTD4

UFgirlfan07 · Post by **UFgirlfan07** » Fri Dec 10, 2010 2:52 pm

tebow's coming back as a coach??

Jesus has risen!

Toothy · Post by **Toothy** » Fri Dec 10, 2010 3:07 pm

Here comes Professor Science.

1st I find it hard to believe that Foley hasn't known about this for some time. He and Meyer are close. It makes sense that Foley has known for weeks...maybe months. In other words he has been putting out feelers to people he can trust to keep their mouths shut. 9 years ago Foley was caught with his pants down. I don't see that happening again.

2nd Foley does not seem to be a sentimental guy. Spurrier had to reapply for a job he made great. If Foley forced that then he will always do what is best for UF football, not worrying about hurting someone's feelings. SO, Why is Meyer staying through the bowl game? If we hired someone like Gruden wouldn't he want to come in immediately? Logically, Meyer's bowl game retention tells me that the next coach is not available right now--and won't be until January.

3 Foley likes to hire people he knows--and people who are connected to UF. All of his football hires indicate this, even Meyer.

These facts lead to conjecture.
Who can't leave their job until January, and is connected to the program?

Gruden would not want to weight to get started until Jan.
Harbough, Petrino, and Kelly have no connection to UF.
Mullen would be in town already.

Logic dictates that we will coached by Bob Stoops next year.

GO Gators
QUACK

Read more: http://www.gatorcountry.com/swampgas/showthread.php?t=178546#ixzz17k1HHm3H

DocZaius · Post by **DocZaius** » Fri Dec 10, 2010 3:11 pm

That's interesting logic. No way Stoops is taking this job now.

G8rMom7 · Post by **G8rMom7** » Fri Dec 10, 2010 3:17 pm

One thing that is incorrect...Foley did NOT know Meyer before he went to Utah to interview him. So sorry, but that part is WRONG...Foley does NOT always hire people he knows.

Toothy · Post by **Toothy** » Fri Dec 10, 2010 3:42 pm

I'm telling you, coach transitions are watersheds of douchebaggery. I'm not even working hard on this thread.

slideman67 · Post by **slideman67** » Fri Dec 10, 2010 3:53 pm

watersheds of douchebaggery

CLASSIC! Can I use this phrase?

Toothy · Post by **Toothy** » Fri Dec 10, 2010 3:59 pm

You just did. That will be $4.95.

Toothy · Post by **Toothy** » Fri Dec 10, 2010 4:40 pm

Just heard Brady Ackerman on radio with Frangie say if he was betting he thinks Petrino will get offered the job. Dooley thinks either Mullen or Petrino. Dooley was just on radio as well.

Frank Frangie said Foley's #2 man last time was Petrino and he wasn't offered because Meyer accepted the job who was his main target.

I don't like what Petrino did prior to taking the Arky job.

Read more: http://www.gatorcountry.com/swampgas/showthread.php?t=178008#ixzz17kOUdi32

Yeah, I give bonus point to Petrino gurus. F that.

slideman67 · Post by **slideman67** » Fri Dec 10, 2010 5:00 pm

I'm telling you those of you who can need to plant some f-ed up rumors on the GC boards.

UFgirlfan07 · Post by **UFgirlfan07** » Fri Dec 10, 2010 5:26 pm

UGH! I don't want Petrino. He's scum.

DocZaius · Post by **DocZaius** » Fri Dec 10, 2010 5:57 pm

I was just in GC chat, where I suggested that Tommy Bowden was being considered.