The Arkansas Razorbacks travel to Gainesville this weekend and head coach Bret Bielema wants everyone to know they are invited to his tailgate party before the game. “Hell yeah! It’s Big Bret’s Traveling Tailgate Bash 2K13! I do this every time my team plays on the road. I did it at Wisconsin, now I’m doing it here at Arkansas. SEC fans say they have the best tailgates, well, prove it,” said an excited Bielema, smelling of a combination booze, Axe Body Spray, and bratwurst.
Bielema had an intern travel down to the University of Florida today to post flyers around campus promoting the tailgate. The festivities will begin at 6 a.m. sharp at the Century Tower and will last right up until kickoff at 7 p.m.
“That tower they got on campus is the most logical spot to have a tailgate because it’s easy to spot and it lets everyone know where the party’s at. Plus, I’m hoping to get a picture where I’m lying on the ground and it looks like the tower is my dick. I’ll probably send that one to my smoking hot ass wife.”
Fans who plan to attend can expect lots of alcohol, beer pong, cornhole, and food among other things, but mostly alcohol. Bielema laid out some of his plans, “I got some things in mind. I’m hoping to get a bros vs. hoes flag football game going. Also, if anyone wants to wrestle me, I’m game, but I hope you’re ready to have your ass planted in the ground because if you fuck with the bull, you’re gonna get the horns.”
Courtesy of The Unsportsmanlike Gentleman