The Back Alley Archives

Well well well. How's everyone doing this morning? I know one piece of shit who's not doing well and that would be The Unsportsmanlike Gentleman. That sad fuck has been locked in his bedroom crying since yesterday afternoon. So I've taken it upon myself to fill-in. So no game recap or whatever stupid shit he does the day after a game. It's just me rubbing my dick in your faces. So let me start by saying:


HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!


FUCK YOU, GAYTORS! IT'S ALL ABOUT DA UUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU!


Oh man, this is the greatest thing to ever happen to me since I stumbled upon the scene of an overturned ambulance and found a cooler with some organs in it that I sold on the black market for a cool $42. I drank like a king that night! But this, this might top that. To see so many dumb fucking Gaytor fans cry is wonderful!


So many people that I want to tell to go fuck themselves right now. First, obviously, The Unsportsmanlike Gentleman. You can go fuck yourself. Yo yo, I bet you laughing real hard now, bro. With your lame ass blog. Will Muschamp can go fuck himself, but I don't think he's smart enough to do it. Umm, Jeff Driskell can go fuck himself, but I'm sure he'd just find a way to turn that over as well. Gaytor fans can all definitely go fuck themselves. How dare you laugh at us! Keep laughing, bitches. Anyone who ever doubted Da U can go fuck themselves. Da U never left and it never will. U mad, fuckwipes? The NCAA can royally go fuck themselves. Take your fucking investigation and shove it up your bumbling ass. Unlike Aaron Hernandez's victims, Da U is bulletproof! What? Awww, too soon? Fuck you. All of you can hold my dick. You can also hold my right nut and I would say you could hold my left one, but I don't know where that one went.


I'm so happy! Of course, I didn't see the game. Cut me some slack, I'm homeless. I don't even know the final score. I'm just assuming the Gaytors lost because I saw a sad fucking Gaytor fan crying heading into an IHOP. Now, he could've been crying because I hit him in the head with a beer bottle I threw. Or maybe he was crying because the realization finally set in that he had made many terrible life decisions that lead him to that point of eating at an IHOP and their shitty food that's not even fit for a homeless man like myself. I guess we'll never know his story.


WOOOOOOOOOO! MIAMI HURRICANES, MOTHERFUCKERS! WE RUN THIS STATE! IT'S ALL ABOUT DA UUUUUUUUUUUUUU! I HOPE THE REST OF YOUR SEASON SUCKS, GAYTOR FANS! I'M OUT, BITCHES!


Courtesy of The Unsportsmanlike Gentleman