How the Herbstreit Stole Orange Bowl Tickets
Posted: Fri Dec 07, 2012 2:47 pm
http://thesmackzone.wordpress.com/2012/ ... l-tickets/
Down in Huskie-ville
Liked the BCS a lot…
But the Herbstreit,
Who lived just north of Huskie-ville,
Did NOT!
The Herbstreit hated the BCS! The whole BCS season! Now, do we have to ask why? NIU is the reason. “They’re Going to the Orange Bowl!” he snarled with a Sneer. “It’s A bad state for football” they shouldn’t be There, it just seems queer.
Nervously drumming, with his Herbstreit fingers, he spoke with a screech!
“They don’t deserve to be in the BCS this year. Are you kidding me?”
Northern Illinois was going to South Beach.
Then the Huskies, young and old, would sat down to a feast. And they’d
Feast! And they’d feast! And They’d FEAST!
FEAST!
FEAST!
FEAST!
They would feast on orange juice, sherbert, and oranges! This was something
The Herbstreit couldn’t stand in the least!
And THEN
They did something
He liked least of all!
Every Huskie down in Huskie-ville, the tall and The Small, they’d stand hand-in-hand. And the Huskies started singing!
They’d sing! And they’d sing!
AND they’d SING! SING! SING! SING!
And the more the Herbstreit thought of this Huskie-Orange Bowl-Sing, the more the Herbstreit thought, “I must stop this whole Thing! FSU deserves a
Better opponent than NIU right now! I must Stop this Orange Bowl from happening!
“I know just what to do! “What a Herby trick!
“With this coat and this hat, I look just like Saint Nick!”
All their windows were dark. Quiet snow filled the air.
All the Huskies were all dreaming of sweet victory Without Care.
Then he slid down the chimney. A rather tight pinch.
But, if Santa could do it, for the Herbstreit this would Be a Sinch.
So they couldn’t even watch, The Herbstreit grabbed the TV and started to Shove, When he heard a small sound like the coo of a dove.
Little Cindy-Lou stared at the Herbstreit and said “Santy Claus, why, Why are You Taking all of our tickets? WHY?
But, you know, that old Herbstreit Was So smart and so slick.
He thought up a lie, and he Thought it Up quick!
“Why, my sweet little tot,” the fake Santy Clause lied, “These tickets Wont
Work, I can’t tell if they are REAL Or NOT!
Then he went up the chimney, Himself, The old liar. He did the same thing to Other Huskies’ houses hour After hour.
“Pooh-Pooh to the Huskies!” he was herby-ish-ly humming. They’re finding Out now the Orange Bowl isn’t coming.”
He stared down a Huskie-ville!
The Herbstreit popped his eyes!
Then he shook!
What he saw was a shocking surprise!
Every Huskie down in Huskie-ville, the tall and the small,
Was singing! Without any tickets at all!
They were proud of thier team. Proud of them one and ALL!
And the Herbstreit stood puzzling and puzzling: “How Could it be So? With no tickets they can’t go!
And the minute his ego didn’t feel Quite So tight, He whizzed with all His tickets Through the bright Morning light. ”I will give them their tickets and Let Them watch. Against FSU they Won’t Put up a fight. Let them play They’ll Prove me right.”
The Herbstreit returned the tickets To All, he couldn’t wait for NIU to
Fall.
Down in Huskie-ville
Liked the BCS a lot…
But the Herbstreit,
Who lived just north of Huskie-ville,
Did NOT!
The Herbstreit hated the BCS! The whole BCS season! Now, do we have to ask why? NIU is the reason. “They’re Going to the Orange Bowl!” he snarled with a Sneer. “It’s A bad state for football” they shouldn’t be There, it just seems queer.
Nervously drumming, with his Herbstreit fingers, he spoke with a screech!
“They don’t deserve to be in the BCS this year. Are you kidding me?”
Northern Illinois was going to South Beach.
Then the Huskies, young and old, would sat down to a feast. And they’d
Feast! And they’d feast! And They’d FEAST!
FEAST!
FEAST!
FEAST!
They would feast on orange juice, sherbert, and oranges! This was something
The Herbstreit couldn’t stand in the least!
And THENThey did something
He liked least of all!
Every Huskie down in Huskie-ville, the tall and The Small, they’d stand hand-in-hand. And the Huskies started singing!
They’d sing! And they’d sing!
AND they’d SING! SING! SING! SING!
And the more the Herbstreit thought of this Huskie-Orange Bowl-Sing, the more the Herbstreit thought, “I must stop this whole Thing! FSU deserves a
Better opponent than NIU right now! I must Stop this Orange Bowl from happening!
…But HOW?”Then he got an idea!
An awful idea!
THE HERBSTREIT
GOT A WONDERFUL, AWFUL IDEA!
An awful idea!
THE HERBSTREIT
GOT A WONDERFUL, AWFUL IDEA!
“I know just what to do! “What a Herby trick!“With this coat and this hat, I look just like Saint Nick!”
All their windows were dark. Quiet snow filled the air.
All the Huskies were all dreaming of sweet victory Without Care.
Then he slid down the chimney. A rather tight pinch.
But, if Santa could do it, for the Herbstreit this would Be a Sinch.
He slithered an slunk with a smile most unpleasant, He stole all their
Tickets, no one would get a present!
Tickets, no one would get a present!
So they couldn’t even watch, The Herbstreit grabbed the TV and started to Shove, When he heard a small sound like the coo of a dove.
Little Cindy-Lou stared at the Herbstreit and said “Santy Claus, why, Why are You Taking all of our tickets? WHY?
But, you know, that old Herbstreit Was So smart and so slick.He thought up a lie, and he Thought it Up quick!
“Why, my sweet little tot,” the fake Santy Clause lied, “These tickets Wont
Work, I can’t tell if they are REAL Or NOT!
Then he went up the chimney, Himself, The old liar. He did the same thing to Other Huskies’ houses hour After hour.
“Pooh-Pooh to the Huskies!” he was herby-ish-ly humming. They’re finding Out now the Orange Bowl isn’t coming.”
He stared down a Huskie-ville!The Herbstreit popped his eyes!
Then he shook!
What he saw was a shocking surprise!
Every Huskie down in Huskie-ville, the tall and the small,
Was singing! Without any tickets at all!
They were proud of thier team. Proud of them one and ALL!
And the Herbstreit stood puzzling and puzzling: “How Could it be So? With no tickets they can’t go!
And what happened then…?
Well… in Huskie-ville they say
That the Herbstreit’s ego
Grew three sizes that day!
Well… in Huskie-ville they say
That the Herbstreit’s ego
Grew three sizes that day!
And the minute his ego didn’t feel Quite So tight, He whizzed with all His tickets Through the bright Morning light. ”I will give them their tickets and Let Them watch. Against FSU they Won’t Put up a fight. Let them play They’ll Prove me right.”The Herbstreit returned the tickets To All, he couldn’t wait for NIU to
Fall.
Infact… HE HIMSELF…!Wants to attend the Orange Bowl!
He wants to watch the Huskies fall short of their GOAL!
He wants to watch the Huskies fall short of their GOAL!