The Back Alley Archives

Rather than do my traditional preview, I thought I would share with you a little "fact sheet" about Florida and Florida State, comparing the two universities. This had its roots way back in the early days of the internet - I first saw a version of it on some surely now-defunct site.

So here's my take:

[TABLE="class: grid, width: 90%, align: center"]
[TR]
[TD]Name:[/TD]
[TD]University of Florida[/TD]
[TD]Florida State University (formerly, Florida State College for Women)[/TD]
[/TR]
[TR]
[TD]Founded:[/TD]
[TD]1853[/TD]
[TD]1857[SUP]*[/SUP]
[SUP]*[/SUP] in 2000, then-FSU-President Sandy D'Alemberte retroactively changed the school's founding date to 1851 so that the school could appear to be older than UF.[/TD]
[/TR]
[TR]
[TD]Nickname:[/TD]
[TD]Gators (adopted in 1911 as "Alligators"): a vicious reptilian predator, known for its ferocity, speed and thick hide.[/TD]
[TD]Seminoles (adopted in 1947): a politically incorrect and controversial caricature of Native American culture.[/TD]
[/TR]
[TR]
[TD]Mascots:[/TD]
[TD]Albert and Alberta:

[/TD]
[TD]A white guy pretending to be a Native American, My Little Pony and these guys:

[/TD]
[/TR]
[TR]
[TD]First Football Game:[/TD]
[TD]1906[/TD]
[TD]1947 (prior to that, Florida State was all girls)[/TD]
[/TR]
[TR]
[TD]Campus Architecture:[/TD]
[TD]Collegiate Gothic:

[/TD]
[TD]Strip Mall
[/TD]
[/TR]
[TR]
[TD]Location:[/TD]
[TD]Gainesville (one of Money Magazine's "Best Places to Live")[/TD]
[TD]Tallahassee (full of corrupt politicians)[/TD]
[/TR]
[TR]
[TD]Colors:[/TD]
[TD]Orange & Blue[/TD]
[TD]Ketchup & Mustard[/TD]
[/TR]
[TR]
[TD]National Football Championships:[/TD]
[TD]3 (1996, 2006, 2008)[/TD]
[TD]2 (1993, 1999)[/TD]
[/TR]
[TR]
[TD]All-time Football Record:[/TD]
[TD]679–386–40 (.633)[/TD]
[TD]483–236–17 (.668)[/TD]
[/TR]
[TR]
[TD]Conference:[/TD]
[TD]SEC, universally lauded as the toughest football conference in the nation[/TD]
[TD]ACC, LOL[/TD]
[/TR]
[TR]
[TD]US News & World Report Ranking:[/TD]
[TD]#17 among public universities[/TD]
[TD]#42 among public universities[/TD]
[/TR]
[TR]
[TD]Notable Academic Achievements:[/TD]
[TD]

• Member of the American Association of Universities
• Ranks 14th among ALL universities in number of National Merit Scholars enrolled
• Considered a "Public Ivy" university

[/TD]
[TD]Nothing. Absolutely nothing. No, wait, I take that back. FSU has one of the top 10 interior design graduate schools in the country. Srsly. Also, a clown college.[/TD]
[/TR]
[TR]
[TD]Notable alumni:[/TD]
[TD]Nobel Prize laureates Robert Grubbs and Marshall Nirenberg; actor Stephen Root; home-improvement guru Bob Vila; Florida Governors Lawton Chiles, Rubin Askew, Bob Graham, Buddy MacKay; more Olympic athletes, scientists, politicians, authors and artists than you can shake a stick at.[/TD]
[TD]Washed-up actor Burt Reynolds. Fitness whacko Richard Simmons.[/TD]
[/TR]
[TR]
[TD]NCAA or National Championships in all sports:[/TD]
[TD]29 (249 athletes have won individual national titles)[/TD]
[TD]12[/TD]
[/TR]
[TR]
[TD]2011-12 Sears Directors' Cup Rank:[/TD]
[TD]2nd (Florida has placed in the top 10 of the Directors' Cup rankings every year since its inception in 1983)[/TD]
[TD]5th (highest ever)[/TD]
[/TR]
[TR]
[TD]2011-12 Capital One Cup Rank:[/TD]
[TD]1st (men), 9th (women)[/TD]
[TD]Unranked[/TD]
[/TR]
[/TABLE]

Will Driskell start?

Is our O-line healthy?

Lets get it on!

Good first drive. Good qb play. I'm happy with 3.

Don't know how that fucker got open but our D is bringing the pressure and I like it. Elam with the int!

Big run by Driskell. His ankle must be okay.

Fuck. What was that? That is why Burton isn't our starting qb.

Should have kicked a fg.

FSU's QB looks like he's the hardass lieutenant in a buddy cop movie.

Good first quarter. I would like to have a td but we're moving the ball and Driskell is getting rid of it when he has to. Our D-line has made a home in the FSU backfield.

Hope we can keep it up.

Defense coming up big on third down again. I can dig it.

That's bullshit. That was a catch.

Fumble on the kickoff. Sweet. Hopefully we can capitalize on it.

TD Gillislee! Fuck yeah!

Holy shit jelani Jenkins

Shit.

Lol fsu fans booing their own team.

Damn how sweet would it have been to shut out FSU at home?

Oh well I like what we're doing. Hope FSU can't adjust.

nice anothet int

Gettibg tired of all these holding penalties.

Fuck

Doublefuck

Triple fuckbeans

Damn refs are determined to give fsu an advantage.

Helldamnfart.

ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME HOW IS THAT PASS INTERFERENCE?