Scouting Report: University of Georgia Bulldogs

[The Unsportsmanlike Gentleman]

Founded: 1952. The story goes that a dumb kid sold his cow for some magic beans that he planted in the ground and the university grew from that spot. But we all know that's horseshit because Georgia has a water shortage and don't nothin' grow there 'cept peaches, pecans, and billboards. And I'm skeptical about the peaches and pecans. South Carolina has better peaches anyway. And no one gives a shit about pecans. If you're gonna eat a nut, everyone knows almonds are healthier for you. I also encourage our Georgia brethren to enjoy a mouthful of Deez. Get it? Deez nuts? Like, these nuts, but I'm pointing at my testicles and stating that you, a Georgia fan, should put them in your mouth because that's hilarious and I am awesome. I know I had to walk you through that, but you are a Georgia fan and you all are not the fastest thinkers. I'm just glad I could help someone today because deep down inside I hate myself, but you know what that's like. You had Jim Donnan as a head coach. Wait, why the fuck is a Georgia fan reading this? GET THE FUCK OUT OF HERE! AND DON'T YOU EVER COME BACK! Great. Now I have to delete the site and start over because it's tainted. Fuck Georgia.


Location: At the 5 yard line of the Georgia Dome.


Least Famous Alum: Quincy Carter.


Head Coach: Mark Richt. He still hasn't been fired? What's it gonna take to boot the coach with the highest win percentage in school history out the damn door? I just don't know what y'all are waiting for, Georgia fans? I'da fired him long ago.

Strengths: Trying so hard to be like Florida. We were having season ending injuries way before you were. That's our thing, posers.


Weaknesses: Playing the game the way it was meant to be played--without Georgia.


Player To Watch: I've always enjoyed watching Knowshon Moreno.




Fun Fact: Every Georgia kicker since 1932 has been named either Marshall, Morgan, or Brice.


Predictions: I asked you all on Facebook and Twitter for your predictions for the game and here are some of your responses. Apparently, we will see a lot of ACLs being torn on Saturday.

[INDENT]@UnsportsmanGent Will Muschamp tears his ACL.
— David (@freitag22) October 29, 2013[/INDENT]

[INDENT]@UnsportsmanGent Muschamp tears his ACL while talking to someone on the bench about avoiding injuries
— Tyler Barkley (@TheTylerBarkley) October 29, 2013[/INDENT]

[INDENT]@UnsportsmanGent Both teams sustain so many injuries they go 7-on-7
— keithmarder (@keithmarder) October 29, 2013[/INDENT]

[INDENT]@UnsportsmanGent Jeff driskel will break his leg watching from home. And Easley will play with four ACLs
— Beat UGA (@GatorChomp16) October 29, 2013[/INDENT]

How about some predictions other than injuries?
[INDENT]@UnsportsmanGent Prediction: Crimson Tide win easily.
— The Bull Gator (@TheBullGator) October 29, 2013[/INDENT]

[INDENT]@UnsportsmanGent I will blackout
— Huh? (@Bourbon_Brown) October 29, 2013[/INDENT]

[INDENT]@UnsportsmanGent Mark Emmert hands both teams bowl bans citing "the atrocities on the field"
— Bart Moon (@BGMoon5) October 29, 2013[/INDENT]

[INDENT]@UnsportsmanGent plague
— PRW (@prwelber) October 29, 2013[/INDENT]

Aw, thanks, Susan! Me too. That's what it's all about. Having fun and of course, beating Georgia!


Courtesy of The Unsportsmanlike Gentleman